One of the strangest eBay Go auctions I have seen
marketing hyperbole inspired by Hikaru No Go?
I came across this eBay auction for a cursed goban. The seller claims that the goban is made of Hyuga Kaya. It was originally purchased for $10,000 and was offered at auction with a starting bid of $2,000. There were no bidders.
Here's the key excerpt from the item's write-up. The red font emphasis is mine.
This is a unique set, assembled in consultation with an experienced Nihon-jin go-player and tastemaker. The set is a joy to play and a marvel to see; ready to be admired for a lifetime and willing to be played every day. Yet, because this goban is honto Hyuga-no-kuni kaya from Miyazaki, Kyushu, it will only rise in value over time. There is an annual quota for the ancient trees (torreya nucifera) of which a one piece board like this is made, available only at auction to the licensed craftsmen who form these treasures by hand. That quota is smaller each year as climate changes and market forces take their toll.
This set of goban, goishi and gosu is a one-of-a-kind opportunity for the serious collector or Go afficionado.
That statement perhaps begs the question why I am selling an object with which I am so clearly in love. The simple fact is that this board is cursed. From the moment it entered my home my life went south. There are people out there at the close of this annus atrox that need your sympathy more than I, but let me tell you, I have had a string of bad luck, karmic retribution and hellfire from that day forward. If there is kami in this board it is baaad kami. And there is big kami in this board; I did not lose a single game I played on it. So trust me on this, if it is not a demon escaped from the nine hells, it is the hungry ghost of the Nabeshima Bakeniku. That, or whoever made this thing was a bitter man, if man he be.
And if it wasn't cursed when I bought it, I can assure you it comes with all the mojo jojo juju I can muster. I hope you get cancer. Thanks, and happy bidding.
All this brings a couple of quotes to mind.
Thirteen at a table is bad luck if the waitress only has twelve chops.
- from The Marx Brothers
If my life goes south after I bought a $10,000 goban, it would probably be because ChiyoMama found out that I bought a $10,000 goban.